I met Nikki when I started dating my husband. I learned that if I was taking fresh eggs to his place, that I'd better be careful, because she was an egg thief, and knew how to get you to drop one. I knew that she was part of a package deal, and I didn't care, I loved her from the moment I met her. When we bought this house, and moved in, and got her moved in, she was trained not to get on the furniture prior to moving in...well, I swiftly changed that, and she swiftly embraced that change. She was my buddy, and my pal. When I was feeling bad, or having a bad day with my hips, she would stick with me, and we would watch Sponge Bob, or Scooby Doo together. If she was in another room, and herd the theme song to Sponge Bob, she came running, and up on that couch she got. I loved Nikki. Frank Loved Nikki, everybody loved Nikki. And yes, Sam and Jasper loved Nikki.
We waited until May of 2014 to bring home another family member. We had answered several ads on Craigslist, to only find out that it was either a scam, or that somebody else had beaten us to the punch. We went to the animal shelter, only to find that there were only dogs in there that needed to in a one dog home. Well, that most certainly wasn't going to work, because we had Sam and Jasper waiting at home for us. Then, a friend of ours had a dog that she needed to rehome. We talked about it, and finally went to meet Bella. Bella was 11 months old at the time, and when I saw that hound dog face, I was in love. We brought her home, with all of her gear, and worked on the introductions, and within a months time, we were able to trust all 3 dogs together. She pretty much so worships Jasper, and gets into trouble with Sam. Those first couple of months I went through some serious emotions.. I was happy to have her here with us. I felt like I was betraying Nikki's memory and home bringing her here. I was up, I was down, I was still hurting over Nikki. (I still have moments when I tear up, and just break down over a picture, or a random post, or just something. Those feelings are fewer and further in between now, but she will always be there in my heart.) I can pinpoint the moment when I stopped feeling guilty. Frank was at work, and Sam, Jasper, Bella and myself were settled in for the night. Bella had gotten in my chair and was curled up sleeping. She let out the sweetest sigh, and I knew, that she truly does belong. She's happy. We all love her, and Sam and Jasper have made her part of the pack. She makes me laugh, she gives me headaches, she drags the toys out of the toy box and leaves them all over, and she loves us back.
I don't know if any of you have ever gone through these feelings of remorse and guilt when it comes to the circle of life with your 4 legged friends. This post is dedicated to you, to let you know that you are not alone. Every dog is different, and comes with their own personalities, but one thing is for sure and certain, they will love you until their last breath.